Article by Peter J. Normandia. Follow me on twitter.

I recently was lucky enough to get to meet world renowned Brazilian Jiu Jitsu master, Jeff Glover. For those that don’t know, Jeff Glover is one of the best in the world, having won the No Gi Championship in 2007. Here is a great rundown on Jeff from the ADCC website…

This 145 pound black belt is a product of Ricardo “Franjinha” Miller. Now a days Jeff Glover is a teacher in a huge gym called Paragon Jiu-Jitsu, with four training centers in California. He was recently quoted in Gracie Mag to have “the most respected guard in the United States”. In 2007 Glover won gold in the no-gi World Championship.

Now, I have met and trained with, or taken seminars from, many world renowned Martial Artists. However, Jeff is the youngest I have ever encountered and what struck me was his personality. He is funny, over the top, and down right a joy to be around. Now, in a sport where you need to be tougher and smarter then your opponent, this may seem like a strange trait. However, to me, this is exactly why Jeff is a champion. He is himself at all times, and simply enjoys every minute of his day doing what he loves.

Jeff, himself is quoted on the ADCC website as saying…

I’ve been involved in jiu-jitsu for over ten years now, and my love for the art continues to be the driving force in my life.

That is something we at Yin vs Yang have been preaching forever. With the economy in ragged shape, housing at an all time low, and the majority of the world struggling to stay afloat, Jeff is a constant reminder that if you do what you love, none of that matters. He didn’t set out to make money by becoming a Jiu Jitsu champion. He simply started out wanting to train and get better. He told our school that he would get tapped over and over and over again, continually just trying to find his game. Eventually, his persistence paid off, and he even became known as having one of the best guards around. He mastered the deep half guard game, becoming an expert and revolutionizing its use. He did all this because he loves to.

Sometimes in life, we set goals for ourself that are far away. In Jiu Jitsu, you don’t set out to be a world champion. That is a great accomplishment. Truth is, you set out to train every day. Eventually, the opportunity presents itself because of the hard work you put in. Then, when you enter the tournament, that is when the goal of being a world champion sets in.

To be happy in life, we must set out with one goal: find what we love to do, and do it every day no matter what. In another words, “When the Passion is There, Success is Easy”

For more incredible videos on Jeff Glover, check out Grappler’s Quest ‘Best of Jeff “The Pipelayer” Glover’ video list.

(taken from my iphone)

Article by Peter J. Normandia. Follow me on Twitter.

I have been quite busy lately, and not able to write as often as I like. Actually, I probably could if I wanted to, but I honestly have been focused elsewhere.

One of the great things this break has given me is a chance to really re-evaluate some of the things I wanted to write. Well, I was lucky enough to see an example of this in the flesh when Robert Drysdale gave a seminar at my Jiu Jitsu school.

For those that don’t know, Robert Drysdale is one of the top Jiu Jitsu guys in the world. He was Randy Couture’s Jiu Jitsu coach on season 1 of the Ultimate Fighter, and he most recently was Frank Mir’s coach against Brock Lesnar at UFC 100.

I have been to many Martial Arts seminars by greats such as Royler Gracie, David Adiv, Joel Brutus, and Rodrigo Pinheiro. All of their seminars were filled with excellent technique demonstrations, powerful lessons, and incredible learning experiences. However, there is one way that Robert Drysdale’s seminar differed from all the rest.

He incorporated more than just the technique, he included lessons on attitude as well.

When he would show a move, he would talk about two parts. First, he spoke of how & when to perform the technique he was teaching. Secondly, he spoke about the state of mind needed to pull off the move. So for example, when facing a larger opponent, he spoke of completing 3 moves to every one that the larger guy does. This is how you use your speed to an advantage as a smaller individual.

It was very interesting to hear what I have been privately learning since I started Jiu Jitsu. The techniques are all teachable and easy to learn. However, in the state of mind you have during battle that determines how successful you are.

It is amazing how much an effect your state of mind has on your performance!

In life and in business, it is much the same. The art of making money, building a business, and doing the work is rather simple when you think about it. It is the state of mind you take into work everyday that makes all the difference. It is the vigor you attack the obstacles in the way of achieving your goals that matters most.

And, most importantly, as Robert Drysdale mentioned, it is the attitude of a winner that allows you to overcome any challenge. Being afraid of losing is the same as being afraid of winning.

What matters is building the confidence in yourself that you can solve and meet any challenges you face.

Then, when you wind up in a tough predicament, you will be confident you can overcome that too, b/c you have done it before, and can do it again.

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I just got home from taking my wife to the airport.  What a strange trip it was and what an amazing experience I just had.  It all started a few months ago, when my wife’s friend (& boss), Christina, decided she was finally going to visit her good friend overseas in London, England.  My wife, an avid reader of many London-based tales, had always wanted to go.  However, times were a little financially tight right now to be considering European vacations.

It just so happens, that because of Christina’s friend, the trip was only going to cost abut $700 total for a week in England.  Now, obviously that does not include spending money, however, that is still definitely too good a deal to pass up. I told her to go, and after a while, and much debating, she decided she would.  I thought it was great.  She was excited too, but kept wishing I could go with her.

In the weeks leading up to the trip, I heard all sorts of how much she would miss me, and how it was killing her to go.  I laughed, reassuring her that everything would be fine.  It was only a week I said, and she was getting to visit a place she may never get the chance to go back to, at least for many years.  She then asked me countless times if I would miss her.  ‘Of course, I said.’  I will miss you soooo much.

Truth is, as I knew I would miss her, I did not think of it as a big deal.

It is only a week and women always tend to make a big deal over nothing.  I am not that emotional of a person, and to me, one week a part might even be a good thing.  I mean it’s one week of us both able to take some space and relax.  We have the rest of our lives together.  This next week, in fact, would be great.  I could really focus on work and put all my effort towards what needs to be done without having to worry about the daily things we do together such as dinner, and hanging out.

All in all, I barely thought about the whole trip leading up to today.  For the last few days, I reassured my girl that it was no big deal as she got more & more emotional about leaving.  ‘People do this all the time’, I told her.  Then last night, as it was getting closer to bedtime, I could not understand why my wife was still agonizing over this.  It’s like, yo, come on, it is only one week.  7 days.  168 hours.  It is not that big of a deal. Just relax and get some sleep. It will be fine.

Then came the trip to the airport.

I got up about 4:15 am.  I walked our new dog (more on that later this week), and packed up the car.  Christina arrived, and we left for the 45 minute ride to the airport.  I must admit, as we were driving, it was a little strange.  I mean, I spend everyday with my wife.  I complain about the errands she makes me run.  I get annoyed when she disturbs my sports shows or interrupts me when I am working.  I get annoyed at all the little things I have to reassure her about.  I flip out when she leaves my work computer on, or if she puts the light on to read when I am sleeping.

Basically, by spending everyday together, the only things that change are the things we get annoyed at.  Sometimes, I wonder if these things will ever get better.  My wife and I can fight with the best of them, so there have been plenty of times I have been frustrated by the way she acts, even though I know it is out of love.

As we were getting off the exit to the airport, my wife began crying a little.  She was excited, but she really was going to miss me.  I had to wonder why, but it certainly was sweet. I am not much of an emotional person when it comes to these things, so I just wanted to let her know I love her, give her the reassurance she needed, and make sure the luggage guys don’t rip her off.

I pulled up, parked in front of the terminal (terrible name for anyplace btw), and got out to unpack the car.  I hailed down a luggage guy, passed my wife the tip money, and unloaded everything from the trunk. Finally, the moment was here. It was time to say goodbye.  I smirked, as I always do for some reason when it is one of those moments, and my wife began balling.

‘I don’t want to leave you!’

I hugged her tight, hoping it would relieve her sadness and get her on her way.  However, during this hug, the reality started to set in.  My wife was leaving for a week.  I’m going to be so lonely.  What if something happens?  How am I going to live without her for the next week?  I squeezed a little tighter, fighting back a few tears that were peeking over my eyelids, and kissed her one more time.

I got back in my car, pretending I was fine, and waved goodbye as she followed the baggage guy into the airport with Christina.  I drove off, and all of the things I had heard my wife complain about for weeks were now real.  I missed her dearly, I did not want her to go, and it definitely was not even close to as easy as I thought.

About 10 minutes into my ride home, I was already on the phone calling her again to tell her I love her and to be safe.  I never do stuff like that.  I never get too emotional, and I definitely never expect to.  I mean, it is only a week, right?  What once felt like some nice quiet time to get work done, suddenly became morbidly depressing to think of.

This is not to say I wish my wife did not go.  I think it is great, and I would NEVER, ever want it any other way.  I could never live with the fact I was so selfish with my fears, that my wife couldn’t experience a possible once in a lifetime trip.  However, I definitely was not ready for how hard it would be to leave her, even only for a week.

The reason I am sharing this is not to sound like a good guy, or a corny one (too late!).  It just reminded me that in the hubbub of daily life, we sometimes can forget what’s special.  My marriage is a special relationship, not because of some certificate, but because of the bond we share everyday.  It is because we share that bond everyday that we can lose sight of it on a day-to-day basis.  Since it’s always there, we tend to overlook it, or get used to it.  It is only when that is taken away, that we begin to see what it really means to us.

“You never know what you have, until it’s gone.”

I definitely had an experience that showed me the meaning of this famous saying. For all of those out there in a relationship, I just thought I would remind you of the bond you share.  Luckily, if all goes well, my wife will be back in a short time.  For all of those out there who have to separate for much longer, I feel for you. It really is not the same without my wife. No matter how annoyed I may get, or how frustrated she can make me, when it comes down to it, I love her to death.

It just took a week’s vacation to nail it back into my brain.  So be thankful for your relationship, and do me a favor:

Tell that significant other of yours just how much you love them today.

Refresh your memory about the amazing bond you share, the experiences you have lived through, the time you have wasted, and the jokes you have shared with each other.  Then try and picture the day without them.  That is what my week will be like.

It may be quiet for a week, but I wouldn’t change all the regular commotion for anything in the world. One trip to the airport was all it took to remind me deep inside how much I really love my wife.  One week without her already seems like an eternity.  And it’s only been a few hours.

I acted tough for the last few weeks, shrugging off the big deal this trip might be.  It was only a week long I rationalized. Well, big deal is right and I was wrong. It certainly is nice to know I have someone to share my life with and to be reminded of how special that is. Sometimes I just take it for granted, as I bet we all do.

Boy, when did I become such an emotional wreck?