Yin vs YangThe Battle for Success in Life

Today, I happened to catch the first 20 minutes of an interesting documentary about the life of the famous boxer Rocky Marciano.  Being Italian, I always heard stories about Rocky Marciano and his undefeated record of 49-0.  I knew of the legend, but never anything about the real story behind it.

The documentary was interviewing family and friends of Rocky when he grew up in Massachusetts.  They all talked about his great work ethic, and his love of athletics.  But the one thing they said about Rocky that always stood out, was something their parents always repeated to them in Italian…

Non parlarne. Basta andare lì e farlo.

In English, it’s “Don’t talk about it.  Just go out there and do it.”  The quote is nothing special, but the meaning is.  Basically, it means you should never say what you are going to do.  Just go do it, and it will speak for itself.

Before I got into Jiu Jitsu, I used to waste my breath all the time.  I would say I was going to do something.  Then to put pressure on myself, I would tell others about my goal.  I would even talk as if it was already achieved.  However, when it came down to doing it, I never lived up to my end of the bargain, even though I had every honest intention of doing so.

When I got into Jiu Jitsu, that changed pretty quickly.  When you grapple with someone, it does not matter much what you say when you are on the mat and they are choking the life out of you.  The truth speaks for itself.  Well, I’ve found the same goes for life, except for the choking part.

In life, I used to make the same mistake.  I would say one thing, hoping I will reach that goal, only to spend future hours making excuse after excuse on why it did not happen.  The trick is to save your breath, cause it actually is harmful.

Don’t say a word about your personal goals to anyone or you may drastically increase the chances of not achieving it!!!!

Reaching a goal makes us feel great.  We all feel like champions when we set out to do something and achieve it through hard work.  The day we reach that goal, it feels great hearing people speak about it.  Just the simple fact that others know what you have done makes you feel good inside, even if no one ever says a word.  It is a personal satisfaction quite unlike any other.

This satisfaction is what we are after when we speak to others about our goals before we reach them.  We are actually fishing for some satisfaction out of the fact we want to do something.  The problem is, once we speak about it, and get a small sample of that satisfaction, the desire usually starts to fade.

Even if you do talk about a goal, and then actually accomplish it, it can feel empty, like it is missing something.  Talking about a goal let’s others tell you how wonderful it is if you reach it.  If you tell them again when you accomplish the goal, they simply will say ‘Oh, great job.  I am so proud of you.”

How many times have you heard something as lame as that?  It’s like a pre-recorded message on a phone system.  The reason for this is they have already shared in that experience when you told them about it, so the wonder and amazement has already been used up.

Now, compare this with not saying a word about your goal.  You don’t tell anyone anything about it.  You just go out there, work hard, and achieve it.  Then, next time you are with your friends, instead of talking about something, you show them what you’ve already accomplished.  You experience all the joy and satisfaction out of the sincere amazement they display.  It is an incredible moment that can even inspire you to go out an achieve another goal.

So take a cue from the family of the only undefeated Heavyweight Champ in boxing history:  Save your breath and just go out there and DO IT!

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