Yin vs YangThe Battle for Success in Life

Today, I happened to catch the first 20 minutes of an interesting documentary about the life of the famous boxer Rocky Marciano.  Being Italian, I always heard stories about Rocky Marciano and his undefeated record of 49-0.  I knew of the legend, but never anything about the real story behind it.

The documentary was interviewing family and friends of Rocky when he grew up in Massachusetts.  They all talked about his great work ethic, and his love of athletics.  But the one thing they said about Rocky that always stood out, was something their parents always repeated to them in Italian…

Non parlarne. Basta andare lì e farlo.

In English, it’s “Don’t talk about it.  Just go out there and do it.”  The quote is nothing special, but the meaning is.  Basically, it means you should never say what you are going to do.  Just go do it, and it will speak for itself.

Before I got into Jiu Jitsu, I used to waste my breath all the time.  I would say I was going to do something.  Then to put pressure on myself, I would tell others about my goal.  I would even talk as if it was already achieved.  However, when it came down to doing it, I never lived up to my end of the bargain, even though I had every honest intention of doing so.

When I got into Jiu Jitsu, that changed pretty quickly.  When you grapple with someone, it does not matter much what you say when you are on the mat and they are choking the life out of you.  The truth speaks for itself.  Well, I’ve found the same goes for life, except for the choking part.

In life, I used to make the same mistake.  I would say one thing, hoping I will reach that goal, only to spend future hours making excuse after excuse on why it did not happen.  The trick is to save your breath, cause it actually is harmful.

Don’t say a word about your personal goals to anyone or you may drastically increase the chances of not achieving it!!!!

Reaching a goal makes us feel great.  We all feel like champions when we set out to do something and achieve it through hard work.  The day we reach that goal, it feels great hearing people speak about it.  Just the simple fact that others know what you have done makes you feel good inside, even if no one ever says a word.  It is a personal satisfaction quite unlike any other.

This satisfaction is what we are after when we speak to others about our goals before we reach them.  We are actually fishing for some satisfaction out of the fact we want to do something.  The problem is, once we speak about it, and get a small sample of that satisfaction, the desire usually starts to fade.

Even if you do talk about a goal, and then actually accomplish it, it can feel empty, like it is missing something.  Talking about a goal let’s others tell you how wonderful it is if you reach it.  If you tell them again when you accomplish the goal, they simply will say ‘Oh, great job.  I am so proud of you.”

How many times have you heard something as lame as that?  It’s like a pre-recorded message on a phone system.  The reason for this is they have already shared in that experience when you told them about it, so the wonder and amazement has already been used up.

Now, compare this with not saying a word about your goal.  You don’t tell anyone anything about it.  You just go out there, work hard, and achieve it.  Then, next time you are with your friends, instead of talking about something, you show them what you’ve already accomplished.  You experience all the joy and satisfaction out of the sincere amazement they display.  It is an incredible moment that can even inspire you to go out an achieve another goal.

So take a cue from the family of the only undefeated Heavyweight Champ in boxing history:  Save your breath and just go out there and DO IT!

If you enjoyed this, please click DIGG IT below.  Thanks in advance.

Since the first scribblings of communication were drawn in a dark cave long ago, writing has been a therapeutic way for man to release his inner thoughts.   This ancient therapy has been around for a long time, but never has it been easier to write than today.  We have access to computers, phones, recorders, and all sorts of technologies that allow our inner creative juices to be captured.  However, to me, a simple notepad and a pencil is all you really need.

Writing is something many of us don’t do enough of.  I am not only speaking of keeping a diary, or just fiction writing, or any other one form of the art.  I am speaking of writing however you feel is best.  Maybe a blog, or a diary, or a movie script, or a song, or even a poem is your cup of tea.  Whatever form you choose to write in is perfectly fine.  It still has the same beneficial effects.

I personally find that writing this blog helps me each an every day.  I get to spend a little ‘alone‘ time writing about my past.  This gives me a chance to sit here and think about lessons and times I may have forgotten about long ago.  It gives me a chance to revisit parts of my life from a non-objective point of view and most of all, it helps me relax.

Writing can help in many ways throughout your day, so I’ve started a list for us.  I could use your help to continue to add to the list.  Simply leave a comment below with any of the ways you feel writing helps you that I may have forgotten.  Now for my list….

Reflection

Writing gives us a chance to reflect on our past, present, and even future.  The time alone with your writing tool lets you think clearly and uninhibited.  Reflection helps us grow, learn, and move on from our past.

Structure

Any form of writing forces you to structure your thoughts.  This helps strengthen your mind.  Structuring thoughts and organizing words on paper (or screen) helps you learn the best way to communicate.  Simply by forcing yourself to structure your thoughts, you are helping set up a structure for thinking in your head.

An Outlet

Writing is a great way to get things off of your chest, even if nobody else ever reads it.  It helps you tell the story to yourself, allowing you to learn from your past, and come to terms with your humanity.

Memory Enhancement

Even taking notes is a form of writing.  Writing something down gives you a much better chance of memorizing it.  Our mind has an easier time logging the things we write than the things we hear.  Therefore, I also use writing to help myself remember important facts and learn new things quicker.

Amusement

Writing is a creative outlet that allows you to go wherever you please.  Writing funny stories, jokes, quotes, or even one-liners is a great way to amuse yourself, and others if you are comfortable enough sharing.

A Challenge

Nothing is a greater challenge than creating a new habit.  Writing daily is definitely a challenge.  It is very easy to say, well, ‘I have nothing to write today’.  But, of course you do.  Anyone could write whenever they want.  There is no judge, no length, no format or any other kind of restriction.  Writing is good for you, so enjoy the challenge.  Don’t let the challenge get to you either.  Simply put the pen on the pad (or the finger to the keyboard) and see where it takes you!

Lasting

Writing is something you can save and review whenever you desire.  It is a great way to remember your state of mind during the past as well.  I have some old notes my wife sent me when she was in her mid teens.  They are about absolutely nothing, but I treasure them for their ability to transport me back to that time.

Measure of Growth

Continuing on the idea of reviewing writings from long ago, they are also a great way to measure your own growth.  Reading something from a younger state of mind always brings a smile to my face.  It’s amazing the innocence, ignorance, and humanity that comes out from looking back on your past writing.  It also reveals your own growth as a person, and allows you to wonder, ‘was i really that stupid?‘

Self-Fulfilling

Nothing is more self-fulfilling then all of the items mentioned above.  Giving yourself an outlet to reflect on your past helps you grow as a person.  Meeting a challenge helps build confidence.  Structuring your thoughts helps you communicate better.  Reviewing your writing is an amusing, lasting way to help measure growth.  And all of these things help fulfill our soul as a person.

Please add to the list some of the ways writing helps you by leaving a comment…..