Yin vs YangThe Battle for Success in Life

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Article by Peter J. Normandia. Follow me on Twitter.

First off, I hope every Mother had a great weekend. Seems like one day a year is kind of a small price to pay for the amount of support and love a mother can give all year long. Hope the weekend met every mother’s expectations.

Speaking of weekends, I read a great article on Sunday in ESPN the Magazine (May 18th, 2009) titled ‘Mixed Messenger’ by Michael Woods. For all you fight fans, it is a story about the life of Dana White, the head honcho of the UFC. The story takes place at some different times in the life of Dana leading up to the Anderson Silva vs. James Irvin fight. What struck me about the article is the quote they used at the end to sum up the story:

“The picture of Dana White? A little clearer. He’s savvy, but savage, creative but crude, organized but unpredictable – also the recipe for success in the cage.”

Basically, Woods describes him as a ‘walking contradiction’, but in a good way. Like the yin and the yang, Dana has two sides to him, both of which play a pivotal role in who he has become. It was in reading this quote that I felt a lot better about myself. I, too, can be a walking contradiction, as we all can.

What this quote, and story, showed me, was that it’s okay to be both sides of the coin. There are times that call for you to be a nice, caring person. However, if you want to survive in the shady world we live in, then you have to be able to flip the switch, and be ruthless against whatever obstacles stand in your way. In another words, being just one way is sometimes not enough. A fighter can not come in the cage and beat every opponent with the same strategy, and neither can we expect to overcome every obstacle with the same approach in real life.

To be successful in the cage, you have to be prepared, be adaptable, and ready for the unthinkable. Sounds a lot like life, huh? Well, it is. In the cage, all the chit chatter, the reputations, and the thoughts of other people mean absolutely nothing when those cage doors close. Same with life. If you think about it, all the chit chatter, reputations, and things people say about you mean are not the reason whether we succeed or not.

The recipe for success in the cage, and in life, is to be yourself. Dana White gets a lot of flak about his public cursing, his savage response to his critics, and his image as a ruthless CEO. So what? You think he, or his bosses the Fertita brothers, really care? Of course not. They know that Dana being Dana is the reason they are where they are today. They know Dana routinely gives money to people in need, and is a nice caring person. However, they know he is not someone the competition wants to cross either. We should all take note of this when we try to conform to what other people think around us.

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This is not to say it is okay to walk around and be an asshole. However, I am saying that sometimes in life, the best way to get what you want is to be an asshole. Early Sunday morning, while thinking about this, I caught the movie about Madonna’s rise to fame called Madonna: Innocence Lost.

One noticeable thing in the movie was how many of the friends she made that she left behind. It almost seem like she was a ruthless bitch going after her dreams, not caring who she hurt in her way. However, there is one line in the movie that really lets you understand what she is about. Madonna is about to make it big, and is very frustrated with her managers inability to get her a record deal. When she finds someone who can get her that deal, she jumps at the chance. Needless to say, the manager, who has risked everything on Madonna, is devastated. She gets very upset and threatens to throw Madonna out on the street. Madonna responds (at least in the movie):

“Don’t be mad at me because I am moving on and you can’t come with me.”

She goes on to explain how everyone gets mad at her because as she moves on, her friends can’t come with her. That is not her fault, that’s just the way it is. That really made a lot of sense. Life is not predictable, fair, or easy for any of us. Chances and opportunities are far and few between. So when one comes along that can make our dreams come true, we must not miss out because of what other’s may think. If the others are true friends, they will understand. I’m sure Madonna is not regretting getting that record deal and releasing ‘Like a Virgin’.

Dana White, Madonna, and a host of other successful people all have similar stories. They are all caring, creative, ambitious human beings who won’t take no for an answer, or let anyone get in the way of their goals. They can be caring, as well as ruthless in their ambition, depending on what the world calls for. I think we could all learn a little from them as we chase our own dreams in life.

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