A Simple Way to Save Your Breath and Make your Goals Easier to Achieve
Posted by Peter James | Posted in Balanced Life, Business Success Tips | Posted on 03-08-2008
Tagged Under : accomplish my dreams, balance, become successful, find happiness, fufill my life, get rich, help reach goals, inner peace, Rocky Marciano
Today, I happened to catch the first 20 minutes of an interesting documentary about the life of the famous boxer Rocky Marciano. Being Italian, I always heard stories about Rocky Marciano and his undefeated record of 49-0. I knew of the legend, but never anything about the real story behind it.
The documentary was interviewing family and friends of Rocky when he grew up in Massachusetts. They all talked about his great work ethic, and his love of athletics. But the one thing they said about Rocky that always stood out, was something their parents always repeated to them in Italian…
Non parlarne. Basta andare lì e farlo.
In English, it’s “Don’t talk about it. Just go out there and do it.” The quote is nothing special, but the meaning is. Basically, it means you should never say what you are going to do. Just go do it, and it will speak for itself.
Before I got into Jiu Jitsu, I used to waste my breath all the time. I would say I was going to do something. Then to put pressure on myself, I would tell others about my goal. I would even talk as if it was already achieved. However, when it came down to doing it, I never lived up to my end of the bargain, even though I had every honest intention of doing so.
When I got into Jiu Jitsu, that changed pretty quickly. When you grapple with someone, it does not matter much what you say when you are on the mat and they are choking the life out of you. The truth speaks for itself. Well, I’ve found the same goes for life, except for the choking part.
In life, I used to make the same mistake. I would say one thing, hoping I will reach that goal, only to spend future hours making excuse after excuse on why it did not happen. The trick is to save your breath, cause it actually is harmful.
Don’t say a word about your personal goals to anyone or you may drastically increase the chances of not achieving it!!!!
Reaching a goal makes us feel great. We all feel like champions when we set out to do something and achieve it through hard work. The day we reach that goal, it feels great hearing people speak about it. Just the simple fact that others know what you have done makes you feel good inside, even if no one ever says a word. It is a personal satisfaction quite unlike any other.
This satisfaction is what we are after when we speak to others about our goals before we reach them. We are actually fishing for some satisfaction out of the fact we want to do something. The problem is, once we speak about it, and get a small sample of that satisfaction, the desire usually starts to fade.
Even if you do talk about a goal, and then actually accomplish it, it can feel empty, like it is missing something. Talking about a goal let’s others tell you how wonderful it is if you reach it. If you tell them again when you accomplish the goal, they simply will say ‘Oh, great job. I am so proud of you.”
How many times have you heard something as lame as that? It’s like a pre-recorded message on a phone system. The reason for this is they have already shared in that experience when you told them about it, so the wonder and amazement has already been used up. 
Now, compare this with not saying a word about your goal. You don’t tell anyone anything about it. You just go out there, work hard, and achieve it. Then, next time you are with your friends, instead of talking about something, you show them what you’ve already accomplished. You experience all the joy and satisfaction out of the sincere amazement they display. It is an incredible moment that can even inspire you to go out an achieve another goal.
So take a cue from the family of the only undefeated Heavyweight Champ in boxing history: Save your breath and just go out there and DO IT!
If you enjoyed this, please click DIGG IT below. Thanks in advance.
Don’t say a word about your goal to anyone or you will drastically increase the chances of not achieving it!!!!
I think there are exceptions to that rule and it might not be the best mindset
People can often help motivate you and give you support in order to help you reach your goals, just my $0.02
Cheers,
Glen
@Glen
Your $.02 is always appreciated here. I actually adjusted the quote slightly after re-reading it. Thanks for the input.
Wow, it’s excellent that you listen to your commenters, I can’t say that for many bloggers
Good stuff
Cheers,
Glen
@Glen
Taking criticism objectively has always got me further in life than defending my initial position. Plus, you happened to have a very valid point.
Live & Learn!
Thanks for a good article, one thought that came across my mind – I often use other people as a way to keep accountable. By actually having said I am aiming to achieve something means that I have more at stake, and thus increases the likelihood that I would do it.
Do you not get this kind of “pressure” when setting your goals out in the open?
@linuskendall
I used to do the same exact thing. What I found for myself through my life experience is that it is always better to not say a word for two reasons:
1. Pressure is not necessarily a good thing. When you start on a path to a goal, you can’t possibly know how every step is going to turn out. Sometimes things take longer than first perceived, or longer than anyone expects. Sometimes, at least where I grew up, that could lead to people doubting your word, and negative comments. It could lead to doubting yourself. On the other hand, some people use that feedback for motivation.
2. For me, I like to find something internal that motivates me, as I feel it is much stronger force than anything external When it comes down to crunch time, what I told someone usually is not the motivation that will push me to give my all. The only thing that did push me that far was when I truly enjoyed what I was doing.
Hope this helps! BTW…excellent response. Thanks for contributing.
Yeah I see your point. Also the internal motivator is something I find more and more important (sign of growing up?
), often you do a lot of things based on external expectation – I completely agree that the source, the origination if you want, needs to be internal.
But in regards to talking about that the goals once you have that internal motivation – maybe I would end up somewhere in the middle. Working by yourself and in the dark might for sure allow you to avoid negative comments or similar. However, I found telling people what you are doing, why you want to do it and how you want to achieve I find makes it real, tangible. You get feedback, challenges and by putting your goals in words to someone you engage in a thought process to concretize details.
I found also that most beneficial was when I had to speak about my goals in front of people I didn’t know how they would react, or someone who I thought might react negatively – as it challenged me to really stand for what I want to achieve and also my fear of having someone challenge the goal.
@linus…
Those are excellent points, especially about speaking in front of someone. As with anything, I guess it really depends on the person and the situation. I can definitely not say that one way trumps another. Which ever way works for you is always the best way to go.